5 Critical Steps to Take at the Start of Your Divorce

The decision to divorce will forever alter your life, so it’s crucial that you move forward with a plan and take steps to protect your legal interests. At the Law Office of Andrew R. Fischer, we can guide you through this critical time of your life. You can also take the following steps to start your divorce off on the right foot.

1. Get Organized

The divorce can be long and complicated, so the sooner you get organized, the better. You will probably wind up with tons of documents, pictures, and other critical pieces of information during the process. Some ways to get organized for your impending divorce include:

• Write down notes when you meet with professionals on your divorce team
• Keep a binder for your divorce and divide it into relevant sections like legal, financial, and kids
• Invest in a good calendar system to help you keep coparenting commitments in mind

2. Take Control of Your Finances

While it’s common for one partner to handle most of the finances, this won’t help you when it comes time to divorce. You’ll need to know what property you own, where it’s located, and its value when you divorce.
New Jersey is an equitable distribution state, meaning that if the court has to decide what happens to your property, it will try to find an equitable way to divide it between you and your spouse. But first, you must be able to show the court what you actually own.

Some ways to take charge of your finances include:

• Gather financial documents, including tax returns, bank statements, brokerage account statements, retirement account statements, credit card bills, pay stubs, loan documents, insurance policies, and expenses related to your children
• Prepare a list of the property you and your spouse owned before the marriage
• Prepare a current and future budget for your household expenses
• Take pictures of valuable assets
• Run a credit report to identify joint accounts
• Consider meeting with a financial advisor if you need help in this department

3. Be Prepared to Negotiate Parenting

Some of the most important aspects of a divorce concern your children. You can begin laying the foundation for a positive co-parenting relationship now by cooperating with your spouse and trying to figure out a schedule for the year ahead. You can start this process by using a blank calendar and pooling information from your work schedule, your spouse’s schedule, school schedules, and extracurricular activities. You and your spouse can set up a routine for shared custody. Remember that even though you are divorcing from your spouse, they will forever be tied to you as a co-parent. Try to be as professional, courteous, and civil as possible to begin creating this new relationship.

4. Take Care of Your Emotional Health

The emotional impact of a divorce cannot be overstated. You may be dealing with difficult emotions – like fear, anger, disappointment, sadness, and grief – all at the same time. If you are struggling emotionally with this process, you may wish to consider consulting with a divorce therapist. By processing your emotions in therapy, you will be in a stronger frame of mind to deal with the issues ahead. You can also avoid projecting things into your divorce based on the emotional association. A divorce can have many implications for your life – legal, financial, social, and so on. You want to make decisions using your best judgment and reasoning. Likewise, if your children are struggling with the divorce, consider getting help for them so they have a neutral space to discuss their experiences with a trained professional.

5. Speak to an Experienced Family Lawyer

The steps above can help you get your divorce started on the right foot. How you begin your divorce will set the stage for the rest of the process. An experienced family lawyer can help guide you through this complex process and help you avoid costly divorce mistakes. They can also help you accomplish your goal of securing your future and helping you move on with your life in the most positive way possible. A divorce and family lawyer can also explain the relevant divorce laws to you so that you can make informed decisions about issues such as the division of your assets and debts, child custody, spousal support, and child support. If you are gearing up for divorce and would like help from a family law attorney, contact the Law Office of Andrew R. Fischer today to set up a confidential consultation.